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Para sa magulang na may mga anak na nag-aaral, importante na tayo ay maging isang “safe space” para sa kanila – lalo na habang sila ay nasa kanilang formative years na. Ang pagiging isang “safe space” para sa ating mga anak ay importante para sa magkaron tayo ng idea kung kamusta sila sa kanilang mga school dahil madalas ay hindi natin nakikita ang mga nanyayari doon.
Kailangan makita at maramdaman ng ating mga anak na we are there for them at handa tayo na pakinggan sila. This not only helps to establish a good relationship with them but also allows them to feel safe and accepted when events at school are stressing them out.
That said, here are a couple of ways that parents can become a safe space for their children.
Common Struggles of Kids in Schools
Confronting Bullies
Ang bullying ay isa sa mga pinaka-madalas na nagiging problema ng isang bata kapag sila ay binubully sa school. Kapag binubully ang iyong anak, mas magiging challenging ang kanilang oras sa loob ng paaralan. Maari din silang magdevelop ng anti-social behavior kapag sila ang nasa receiving end ng pang-bubully.
Homesickness
Kadalasan, lalo na kapag maliliit pa ang mga bata, nagkakaroon sila ng separation anxiety or homesickness kapag sila ay nawawalay sa kanilang magulang o kapag first time nila sa school. Kids might feel intimidated by their new environment and they might feel anxious about not being at home or in place that they can consider to be a safe space.
Inability to Keep Up With Lessons
Some children might find it difficult to keep up with lessons – especially during face-to-face classes. Maaring sila ay nahihirapan na magtake down notes o baka hindi sila makasunod sa mga itinuturo ng kanilang guro. This could be due to a variety of factors but most likely, it can cause unecessary stress and anxiety on a student.
Making New Friends
This is mostly encountered when the student is new at a school. Maaring mahirapan ang ating mga anak na makakilala ng kanilang magiging group of friends. Although this becomes easier with age, it takes a few extra encouragements for them to come out of their shell as children so they can communicate and be more open to others.
How to be a Safe Space for Your Children
Acknowledge Their Feelings
Importante para sa atin na mga magulang na iparamdam sa ating mga anak na ang lahat ng nararamdaman nila ay valid. As adults, we feel bad when our feelings are invalidated or acknowledged – as such, we should extend the same courtesy to our children. We need to acknowledge their feelings in order to help them get through the challenges that they are facing.
Do Not Judge Them
As parents, we know better than to judge our own children – especially at young ages when they are still starting to explore the world on their own. BIlang mga magulang, kailangan natin ipakita at iparamdam sa ating mga anak na malalapitan nila tayo at handa tayong makinig sa kanila.
Listen Before Giving Advice
Bago tayo magbigay ng payo sa ating mga anak, kailangan muna natin silang pakinggan. Hayaan natin na magkwento o maglagbas ng mga emosyon ang ating mga anak bago natin sila bigyan ng naayon na payo. It would also help to ask your child if they want your advice or if they just want you to hear them out. This also contributes to building trust with your child.
Use Empathy
Bilang mga magulang, kailangan natin magpractice ng empathy. Whether your child chooses to open up to you or not, we should be empathetic about sharing our feelings and accept the fact that children or teens won’t always be able to open up right away.
Bilang mga magulang, lagi nating tandaan na isa tayo sa mga unang nilalapitan ng ating mga anak kapag sila ay may problema. Kailangan natin ipadama sa kanila tayo ay laging nandiyan para sa kanila upang makinig at bigyan sila ng payo.
Sources:
- Harlow, S. (2013). Top Reasons That Kids Struggle in School. Seattlepi.com. https://education.seattlepi.com/top-reasons-kids-struggle-school-3154.html
- Vas, J. (2022, February 23). 10 School Problems Your Child Could be Facing (And How You Can Help). LEAD School. https://leadschool.in/blog/10-school-problems-your-child-could-be-facing-and-how-you-can-help/
- Make It Safe: 5 Ways To Create A Safe Space In Your Home. (2015, March 22). Shameproof Parenting. https://shameproofparenting.com/make-it-safe-5-ways-to-create-a-safe-space-in-your-home/
- MacNamara, D. (2017, November 20). How to be your child’s safe space. Motherly. https://www.mother.ly/parenting/how-to-be-your-childs-safe-space/
- Scott, E. (2017, July 12). How to Become a Safe Place for Your Children: Communication Tips for Openness and Trust. Renewed Hope Parenting. https://renewedhopeparenting.com/how-to-become-a-safe-place-for-your-children-communication-tips-for-openness-and-trust/